11 July 2007

Second-Guessing Everything Ever

If there's anything that's true about me, it's that I want something with the fiery passion of a million suns right up until I get it, when I decide it wasn't nearly as wonderful as I thought it was, and isn't actually what I want at all. This happens with, like, everything. So should it really be a surprise that after I saw a lovely, spacious, clean, affordable one-bedroom apartment in Inwood (with an eat-in motherfucking kitchen, no less), I started having serious doubts about living in the Canadian tundra of Manhattan. Like, that's really far away. I might get lonely. I know people who love Inwood, but they're in live-in couple situations. Am I completely nuts to strand myself up there? Am I completely nuts to be worrying like this? (And Crimenotes, this is not an invitation to plant more doubt about living alone. That's actually a decision I'm happy with.)

As I was walking the mere one and a half blocks to the subway, past the spacious 24-hour supermarket, I my convictions started imploding. And Inwood, a mere two subway stops past Washington Heights (which I adore, but not enough to live in a shoebox) started seeming impossibly far away from everything and everyone I know. Sure, 30 minutes to work, but when the A's running local at night or on the weekend-- but then, when am I out so crazy late on the weekend? Maybe I'll crash at friends' places like Amanda does when it's too far or too late to get back to Harlem. Or maybe that awesome Astoria studio I just saw will suddenly start letting tenants have cats? Maybe I need to sleep on this and stop using my blog as my livejournal.

But while I have you here - anyone know anything (like, what is it even called) about the area of Brooklyn that's just east of the south edge of Prospect Park? By the Winthrop St. stop on the 2 and 5, near some hospital or something?

I want an apartment that feels like an apartment, not a room. I don't want to be lonely in my neighborhood, whether it's because I'm far from my friends or feel isolated in that community. I want to be able to afford my rent.

I want to get to stop worrying about this soon.

6 comments:

Mark said...

Nicolle and I just moved to that part of Brooklyn, causing me to leave my beloved Park Slope after six years. We are even further - the Beverly stop on the 2/5. Drop me a line and I will give you the pros and cons. (Briefly: the pros are that we have more space and the cons are that there are less amenities close by. The commute actually winds up being not significantly longer, actually.)

Tina-cious.com said...

I never lived anywhere near there so I can't help -- but I pointed the wife to your blog. :)

CrimeNotes said...

Live with people in Brooklyn.

Alyssa said...

Is the apartment you're looking at in Astoria in a building or a house? I have counted at least 8 cats in my "No Cats" Astoria building...

Robert Maddock said...

The fiery passion of a million suns! That's HOT. Cool Blog, Jamie!

Robert Maddock said...

I do know how to spell your name: JAIME. There!

Roberto

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